rnagicschoolbussy:

So my grandmother got a Facebook recently and on her profile it says she “Works at Grandmother”

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BUT THEN IF YOU CLICK ON THE LINK THIS SHOWS UP

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WHAT IS THIS I CAN’T BREATHE

(via your-chinese-takeaway)

  • Comic Con: knock knock
  • Me: who's there
  • Comic Con: not you lol

hoganddice:

takethethirdoption:

I went to an Arab-American comedy night and there was a Muslim guy making a joke about being in high school football.

"I was hit so hard, I saw Jesus. Do you know how hard you have to be hit to see somebody else’s god?"

This is what jokes about religion are supposed to look like.

(via ifonlyfor)

sssammich:

someonecalledmefamous:

mu5icliz:

germansam:

tokyosluts:

Sleeping is nice because youre not actually dead and youre not awake so its a win-win situation

It’s like being dead without the commitment.

an open relationship with death

death with benefits

(Source: tokyogals, via your-chinese-takeaway)

cafunedesaudade:

I’m trying to figure out when “oh, it’s midnight” turned into “oh, it’s only midnight”

(Source: estebansraybans, via cagednightingale)

the-vashta-nerada:

it’s cute that they sell family sized oreo boxes thinking that people are gonna share them with their family

(via oyasuminasayassyi)